Even hyperbole does not begin to cover the massive amount of shit that gets blown up in The Expendables.

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I can also say that anyone who’s ever liked video games, especially those titles from the halcyon days of the NES, need to get themselves to a theater and see Scott Pilgrim vs. The World immediately.

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When I found out that Star Wars Celebration V would be held in Orlando, I believe my entire vocabulary for the next 3 minutes was “Holy Shit! Holy Shit!” repeatedly.

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Had I realized that the directors How To Train Your Dragon were behind my favorite animated movie of all time (Disney’s Lilo & Stitch). How To Train Your Dragon is everything a film should be, and if you’re not smiling ear to ear or have tears of joy throughout the film, your soul is withered and black, and I feel so, so sorry for you.

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The worst thing about Jonah Hex is that you can occasionally see flashes of an excellent story trying to shine through and these glimpses make the overall mediocrity that much more aggravating.

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Par-a-som-ni-a: (n) Any of several disorders that frequently interfere with sleep, occurring especially among children and including sleepwalking, night terrors and bed wetting.

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Inception is like a crime caper as envisioned by M.C. Escher. There’s no reason in the world not to go see this film.

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Aside from being a handy dandy Soul Smear test, this latest Toy Story provides a fantastic story and perfect ending to the series that made Pixar a household name.

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With Predators, Those of you hoping for some brilliant twist on the source material will probably emerge disappointed as what we’re given is pretty much the original movie on a larger scale and a different planet, but for those of you looking for a return to the series’ roots, I think you’ll be quite pleased with the latest rumble in the jungle.

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This flick isn’t for someone who spends their free time annotating the works of Dickens, but for those of you in search of a good reason to scarf popcorn and watch red shirt bad guys mowed down by the dozen, well, you’re in the right place.

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